It’s hard to believe, but I’ve never slept in my bedroom. When I moved in, I slept on a twin sized mattress in my son's room, then as my grandmother's health declined the kids and I kinda moved into my grandmother's room. Before we combined our home and moved into this beautiful home, my grandmother had a stroke, but she didn’t become symptomatic until she had another T.I.A. This stroke messed me up, not only was I in college, but she didn’t know English, and I was in the hospital twelve hours a day because she couldn't communicate with the doctors and nurses and it was  uncomfortable for her. So I would get the kids ready for school and go to the hospital, then go back home to get them off the bus and when James was done with work I would go back.

I felt like death, and I was literally alone… Everyone was busy with their lives while I’m here with everyone’s mom and grandmother. Other than two aunt’s no one called her. She had a couple visits but a few minutes here and there is hardly a reprieve for me. I got sick into the third day because it was either hospital food or starve. There are so much vending machine meals a human can take. As my grandmother got better she was switched to a different floor, and the kids were finally able to visit. After the kids got out of school we’d stay at the hospital until the staff kicked us out (they were nice about it).

Even when grams was in the hospital I didn’t sleep in my room, I think I was too depressed. Crying my self to sleep didn’t help. The kids were already used to sleeping in grandma’s room since we moved my little bed in there too. The feeling of being alone sucked. I can’t quite explain it but my grandmother not being around, kind of felt empty and I wasn’t ready for it.

She came home and required a lot of help for me, but I couldn’t get more help than I already was getting for her which was a home health aide 3x a week for one hour each day. Which is fine, I’ve been always grateful for any help I can get, as I took that opportunity to get groceries.

Grams can’t get up on her own, she requires help all the time and she kinda “forget’s” that she has a walker. I’m her walker, and my waist always has black and blue marks where she holds on. Yep, I’m her walker.

Honestly, I want to applaud my husband, my best friend. No one else would ever understand the devotion I have to make my grandmother comfortable. It’s hard, so hard and he gets it.

Resources I use for Blogging

Here is a list of websites I continuously use for resources on my blog.

Free Stock Images

Mazwai: http://mazwai.com

Gratisography: https://gratisography.com

Stock Video:

Videvo: https://www.videvo.net

Pexels: https://videos.pexels.com



More websites I use:

Canva: www.canva.com

Research and News:

http://science.sciencemag.org

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com

https://www.sciencedaily.com

https://www.psychologytoday.com

https://www.livescience.com

https://phys.org

https://www.seeker.com

Cleaning may add years to your life

New research that was recently published in the Journal of the American Geriatrics Society found that women above the age of sixty-five who consistently engage in household chores are likely to live longer and healthier lives. This is because of the physical activity, which reduces the risk of disease and death.

There was also research done that revealed that thirty minutes of light physical activity every day lowers the risk of mortality by thirty-nine percent. It’s recommended that older adults engage in at least two and a half hours of moderate physical activity such as brisk walking.

Resources:
Sandoiu, A. (1970, January 01). Getting chores done may add years to your life. Retrieved November 19, 2017, from https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/320110.php

So...What is a mini-stroke?

Today I wanted to write about strokes. My grandmother had a mini-stroke a year ago, and it brought about some changes in the household.
First I want to write about Transient Ischemic Attack is also is known as a TIA or "Mini-stroke." This is what my grandmother had.
When a stroke occurs there is A temporary decrease in the blood supply to the brain which causes the following symptoms:

• Dizziness
• visual changes
• weakness, numbness in one or more limbs
• difficulty swallowing

The TIA only lasts a few minutes to a few hours

A Cerebral Vascular Accident or a CVA  is a Stroke that is caused by a clot in a blood vessel or bleeding inside a blood vessel in the brain.
A hemorrhagic stroke occurs when a blood vessel in the brain leaks or ruptures and its also known as a bleed.
After a stroke there may be Behavioral changes which are:

• Depression
• Tearfulness
• personality shifts
• apathy

Sources: 

1. https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/stroke/symptoms-causes/syc-20350113
2. http://www.stroke.org/understand-stroke/what-stroke
3. https://www.medicinenet.com/stroke_symptoms_and_treatment/article.htm
4. https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/7624.php

Not a Guest House

This year has hit me hard when it comes to taking care of my grandmother, and honestly, it should have been the best year of my life. It all started when my aunt came to visit back at the beginning of the summer of 2017. I’ll start from the beginning…

My aunt originally came to visit for only a week, or so she said. Once she was here she revealed that not only is she staying the month, but she wants me to organize a huge party for my uncle. James and I let it go and decided to be good people and see what happens. My aunt came in with the preconceived notion that it was her sister's house. She was unaware or didn’t care that her sister is a guest here, and she was the guests “guest.” I normally wouldn’t break it down to technicalities but in this case I will.

I was under the impression she was coming here to help take care of grandma, I wasn’t aware that I’d be another person’s caregiver. She never slept, required delivery of most food and drinks, and smoked like a chimney to the point where my husband got an asthma attack breathing in the second-hand smoke. Where ever we went outside, she was right there following us. James and I worked from home, so you see how awkward it got.

The reason why she would follow us all the time is that my aunt and grandmother would have heated arguments every day. I was quiet and respectful and never got into any of their arguments, I’d close the door so James or the children wouldn’t hear it. My aunt has a personality disorder, supposedly she has split personalities, and I am completely scared of her. She also stated that my great-grandfather raped her and abused her. The other repetitive argument between them is my aunt getting up at 1,3 and 5 AM to smoke and she would wake up the dog, and leave the door open. Thankfully the one time our cat got out, we got him back.

My aunt would say these horrible things to my grandmother, and once they went 2 days without talking, which carried over to a cookout my other aunt was hosting.

I took one opportunity to visit my brother in upstate New York, as the family was going to babysit their mom for four hours. I went to load things in the car for the kids, and I forgot something, so I quietly went back in the house to get the water bottles, and overheard a conversation she had with my uncle who came visiting from New York. He didn’t say anything because he knew I was there, but she continued talking to him about how dirty I was, and she can’t believe how her sister lives in this filth… I was in a rush, we left a few dishes in the sink… I was going to take care of it later… I pretended I didn’t hear anything. Then my other uncle came over and continued talking mess… on camera because there are security cameras on the perimeter of the house.  

My grandmother doesn’t know what’s going on, because she only speaks Spanish and everyone else speaks English so she didn’t know about anything until I came back. I yelled at my aunt and finally gave her a piece of my mind and backtracked all the horrible things she said to my grandmother, and she proceeds to slam the door of her guest room (my son's room) in my face and stays in there until the next morning. Eventually, she was going to have to use the bathroom. After that point, it was death stares until she left a week later.

Let’s add a graduate program for college, two young children, and a 93-year-old grandmother to the mix.

Let’s just say, it’s because of her we will never ever host long-term guests again.

Of course, I was the bad person in all this and of course, I embrace being the bad person now. With good reason.

We are not Mother Teresa; Were Caregivers

If you are a caregiver like me, you have maybe you heard the following statements from other people.

“Get her a babysitter.” When someone says something like this, it questions my friendship to them. One, my grandmother is not a baby and two no one knows her needs, and her schedule like I
“Why did you sign up for this?” I did not; it became a part of my
“You get to stay home all day.” Yes, I need to, my grandmother falls, she will not remember to take her pills, and she will not do most things without reminding. Yes, I stay home all day, but it is not what you


Today's post is for my fellow caregivers:

Being a caregiver is not easy, many people outside of your house will develop an opinion without knowing any information. People will always have an opinion, but will never help. You can see this when you ask for help, and people pretend you did not even ask.

Honestly being a caregiver is sad. Caregivers often feel abandoned, because they often care for everyone else, while no one acknowledges them. Being a caregiver is physically and emotionally draining, as I have endured many muscle sprains trying to pick up my grandmother after a fall.

We are not Mother Teresa; we get mad frustrated, we cry, and we wonder. It is normal to fall apart while keeping everything together. It is all a learning process; then we just learn as it comes along.

Advice:

Learn how to say no, an example of this is when my grandmother would continually make me get her lottery tickets. I know it is something so small, and I should be able to get it done in five minutes or so, but when she wanted lottery tickets two to three times a day, I refused altogether. I felt like a horrible person but then I realized she needs me, she needs to eat, drink, take a shower and get up among other things. You need to pick and choose your battles. It is okay to say no. Be a sheriff, get things done, create order. It’s the only way you’re going to get out of this alive when its all over.

Quick Facts to Pass The Time

• George Washington had to borrow money to go to his own inauguration.
• An olive tree can live up to 1500 years
• Even though red roses looks the same, there are over 900 different types of red roses.
• When an orange is shown in any of the "Godfather" movies, this means that someone is about to die or a close call is to occur.
• Eating dandelions can make you urinate more.
• An oyster can change its gender.
• About twenty-five percent of the population sneeze when they are exposed to light.
• About 30% of Canadians rely on getting their water from the ground for their domestic use.
• Watermelons are a popular gift to bring to a host in China or Japan.
• The Coliseum in Rome was used regularly for about 400 years‏
• The city of Chicago has the only post office in the world where you can drive your car through.
• There is a town in Texas called Ding Dong. In 1990, the population was only twenty-two people.
• Using recycled aluminum cans and making news cans out of them saves 75% energy compared to making it from new material.
• There is a Harley-Davidson that was designed as an exact replica of a hamburger.
• Twelve men have landed on and explored the moon.

Quick Facts About: Aging and the Elderly

Today's post is a rundown of aging and the elderly. This post is in a study guide style, and its made as a starting point to help you with your research on aging and the elderly. When I turned 21 I became my grandmothers (adoptive mothers) caregiver, and when I turned 30, I became her full-time caregiver.  I was lost, I knew nothing about what I was going to get myself into so I hope this quick guide helps out somewhat.

Let’s start with the stages of grief, and if you're a caregiver it's essential to know this for your own knowledge. Death is unfortunate, but it happens to everyone. It's critical to be open-minded about death and dying as it's been dubbed a negative thing. So, below they are listed:

• Denial
• Anger
• Depression
• Acceptance

Next, is the different senior age groups:

• Young Old/ 65-74
• Middle Old/ 75-84
• Old/ 85+

Gerontology is the scientific study of aging and the elderly.

There are four critical dimensions of gerontology and they are:

•  Biology and physiological aging
•  Population aging
• Psychological aging
• Social aging

Centenarians are individuals who are over 100 years old
The world’s oldest countries ( in millions)

1. China (106.1)
2. India ( 59.6)
3. United States (38.7)
4. Japan (27.5)
5. Russia (19.9)

Some more tips on finding information on aging and elderly:

1. Check out blogs that are written by those who are caregivers
2. There are Facebook groups that have many caregivers in them. I am a member of two groups, and it's comforting to be in a group with people who are experiencing life the same way you are. Just type in “caregivers” or “sandwich generation” in the top search bar on Facebook, then choose the group's tab, and there are hundreds of different groups to join.
3. Research on YouTube, there are many content creators on YouTube that are informative, and its a great value to learn a new thing every day.

How Does Secure Attachment Impact Development?

When a child has a secure attachment to their caregivers, the child feels content when their caregiver is around. The child also becomes upset when the caregiver gets separated.

When a child has a secure attachment, long-term effects include acceptable emotional expression, peer relations, and social skills. A child who has secure attachment may have a greater understanding of other individuals emotions. Those children who have a secure attachment are less aggressive and have less antisocial behavior as well. (Sincero, (n.d.).
The relationship a child has with their caregiver is a prototype for future relationships the child will have. The child establishes trust in the world, and knows that they will be cared for, and allows for emotional regulation as well.
The more secure a child is with their caregiver, it will be easier for the child to become an independent adult. A child that is secure will be confident and resilient, especially when they are confronted with peer pressure at school or social events.
Reference:
Sincero. (n.d.). Bowlby Attachment Theory - Core emotional development in humans. Retrieved June 06, 2017, from https://explorable.com/bowlby-attachment-theory

Benefits of Internet Use: Online Education

Earning a degree online is so much easier than it was ten years ago. Getting an education online has grown in the United States in recent years.

In 2010 Sloan Survey of Online Learning showed that over five million students took at least one online course during the fall, 2009 semester.

There was also a twenty-one percent growth of individuals taking online courses from the year before.

There are more choices when an individual decides to go through an online program as some courses aren’t available at certain schools, and credits are easily transferred nowadays ( Hervey, 2013).

Source:
Hervey, J. O. (2014, July 23). How Online Innovators Are Disrupting Education. Retrieved May 29, 2017, from https://hbr.org/2011/11/how-online-innovators-are-disr

All about herbal supplements

In 1994, the Dietary Supplement Health and Education Act was passed. This gave the supplement industry permission to regulate itself.
Even with three hundred and fifty reports of moderate or adverse events, the companies who create the products remain unregulated.
The Food and Drug Administration believes that there are many medical events go unreported, and even estimates the number of adverse effects because of dietary supplements up to fifty thousand individuals (Kabat, 2012).
When an individual decides to add dietary supplements into their diet, it’s important that they contact their doctor before starting anything new.

It’s also important that the individual does their research on the product before use, and then decide if the product is right for them.
Dietary supplements usually add small print to the label of the product “The label claims have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.
Consult your healthcare professionals before taking any dietary supplements” (Stoler, 2012)
The use of dietary supplements vary from person to person and although individuals may experience adverse effects, those who are healthy may benefit from using dietary supplements to aid in their sports.

Those who use dietary supplements should be healthy, and use the supplements as directed. If an individual is not healthy, the risks of intoxication are very high.
Dietary supplements are currently unregulated, so it’s important that those who choose to use dietary supplements do research on the product of their choice.


Resources:

• Allen, J. M. (2004). Herbal Supplements Can Be Harmful. In A. Ojeda (Ed.), Opposing Viewpoints. Health. San Diego: Greenhaven Press. (Reprinted from Skeptical Inquirer, 2001, January, 25, 36) Retrieved from http://link.galegroup.com.clcc.idm.oclc.org/apps/doc/EJ3010141247/OVIC?u=22506&xid=3b74187d
• Center for Food Safety and Applied Nutrition. (n.d.). Consumers - Dietary Supplements: What You Need to Know. Retrieved May 15, 2017, from https://www.fda.gov/food/resourcesforyou/consumers/ucm109760.htm
• Council for Responsible Nutrition. (2003). Performance-Enhancing Dietary Supplements Are Safe. In J. Haley (Ed.), At Issue. Performance-Enhancing Drugs. San Diego: Greenhaven Press. (Reprinted from Sports Supplements: Common Sense and Responsible Regulation, www.crnusa.org, 2001, May 16) Retrieved from http://link.galegroup.com.clcc.idm.oclc.org/apps/doc/EJ3010285216/OVIC?u=22506&xid=f85e5176
• Kabat, G. (2012, November 26). Herbal Medicines Must Be Safe Because They’re Natural? So Are Strychnine, Arsenic, and Cyanide. Retrieved May 15, 2017, from http://www.slate.com/articles/health_and_science/medical_examiner/2012/11/herbal_supplement_dangers_fda_does_not_regulate_supplements_and_they_can.html
• Office of Dietary Supplements - Dietary Supplements: What You Need to Know. (n.d.). Retrieved May 15, 2017, from https://ods.od.nih.gov/HealthInformation/DS_WhatYouNeedToKnow.aspx
• Stoler, F. (2012, March 23). The skinny on FDA regulation of dietary supplements. Retrieved May 15, 2017, from http://www.foxnews.com/health/2012/03/23/skinny-on-fda-regulation-dietary-supplements.html
• Williams, M. H. (2004, December 31). Dietary Supplements and Sports Performance: Introduction and Vitamins. Retrieved May 15, 2017, from https://jissn.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/1550-2783-1-2-1

Benefits of the Internet: Working From Home

There is an increasing number of individuals who are now working from home, forty-three percent of employed Americans have worked from home at least once in their careers.

Working remotely allows the employees to work from anywhere, which increases time with family, eliminate those long commutes, avoid traffic, and save gas (Kruse, 2013).

Twenty-four percent of individuals who are employed did all or some of their work from home. Working from home is a time saver, as those who work from home don’t get dressed up for work, or commute long hours from work to home which allows those workers to sleep in, and have more time for themselves which lowers depression. Bosses even report that workers are more productive when working from home.

Those individuals who work from home are generally happier, less stressed, and have a less work-family conflict (Dill, 2010). North West University and the University of Namibia investigated the psychological conditions of working from home and working at a location.

The participants were one thousand four hundred and sixty-eight employees of a uranium mine in Namibia. The type of measuring instruments which were used for the study was Survey Work-Home Interaction,-Nikmegen, Psychological Conditions Scale, and Work Engagement Scale. The study was done by providing the questionnaire to those who work from home and those who work on site. The results were forty-six percent felt it was positive to work from home, while the rest felt like working on location negatively impacted their life and family life.

The workers who worked on site began to feel distant towards their roles, and to other people. “Given the physical distance between the employees' work and homes, it is understandable that psychological availability is negatively associated with negative home-work interaction” (Rothmann, Sebastiaan, Baumann, Candice, 2014).

So in the grand scheme of things, working from home is beneficial in many ways.

Sources:

• Rothmann, Sebastiaan, & Baumann, Candice. (2014). Employee engagement: The effects of work-home/home-work interaction and psychological conditions. South African Journal of Economic and Management Sciences, 17(4), 515-530. Retrieved May 13, 2017, from http://www.scielo.org.za/scielo.php?script=sci_arttext&pid=S2222-34362014000400011&lng=en&tlng=en.
• Dill-Shackleford, K. (2010, September 08). Working From Home? You're Not Alone (Pun Intended). Retrieved May 13, 2017, from https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/how-fantasy-becomes-reality/201009/working-home-you-re-not-alone-pun-intended
• Kruse, K. (2013, May 12). Top 10 Benefits of Working From Home (Survey Results). Retrieved May 10, 2017, from https://www.forbes.com/sites/kevinkruse/2012/12/18/benefits-working-from-home/#7bf3e09a1d4c

How Insecure Attachment Impacts Development

There are different kinds of insecure attachments which include ambivalent attachment, avoidant attachment, and disorganized attachment.
Ambivalent attachment is when a child becomes upset when they get separated from his parent, which can mean the child doesn’t feel as if he or she can’t rely on the caregiver when the need arises.
Avoidant attachment stays away from his parents, those children to show avoidant attachment may have parents who are neglecting or abusing them. Disorganized attachment is when there isn’t a clear attachment between the child and the caregiver (Sincero, n.d.).

Reference:
Sincero. (n.d.). Bowlby Attachment Theory - Core emotional development in humans. Retrieved June 06, 2017, from https://explorable.com/bowlby-attachment-theory

The Hartford Circus Fire of 1944, and it's Tribute

Today I wanted to write about the Hartford circus fire of 1944. This fire affected many families, including patients in which I cared for while working in an assisted living facility and as a certified nurse aide.  Patients I helped were either hurt or had brothers, sisters, or mothers who were either hurt or died in the fire. When choosing a statue, the topic of choice is the Hartford Circus Fire Memorial. The memorial was built on July 6, 2005, and lies behind Fred. D Wish Elementary School. The memorial is laid out to mark the exact location of the tent that burned on that day.

It was a steamy Thursday afternoon, and the gigantic Ringling Bros. and Barnum and Baily circus tent were packed with seven thousand people, most of them children who were enjoying their summer vacation with their mothers. This took place during World War II, so many fathers were either at war or creating war machinery to defend our country. Bandleader Evans saw the first sign of trouble, with a small flame near the canvas’ main entrance, but because there wasn’t water handy, it was not doused in time. A small flame became one of Hartford, Connecticut’s worst disaster. Flash forward to July 6, 2005, on a previously empty field behind Fred D. Wish Elementary School lies a beautiful center ring, four granite benches and a bronze disc bearing the names of the victims of their ages (Flood, 2015).

The Hartford Circus fire was the worst disaster in Hartford’s history. There were four hundred and eighty-seven people who were injured. One hundred and sixty-seven people were killed, and one hundred of the dead were older than fifteen. It began with a small flame, which escalated to a deadly fire because of the gasoline-paraffin soaked canvas which was used to waterproof the tent. In those days there weren’t fire codes, which established rules on tents being waterproof yet fireproof. After the disaster, fire codes were used to prevent future tragedies like this one, but it was too late (Hensler, 2012).

On July 6, 2005, in the middle of Barbour Street, Cleveland Avenue, Hampton Street, and Kensington Street near the site of the Stowe Housing Project hundreds of people attended a dedication ceremony on a field behind Fred D. Wish Elementary School. The dedication is laid out to mark the exact location of the tent that burned on that day. In the middle of the dedication, lies a center ring, which has four granite benches, and a bronze disc bearing names of victims and ages. This dedication took four years of the hard world by the Hartford Circus Fire Memorial Foundation, and one hundred and twenty-five thousand dollars from seven hundred private donations (Flood, 2015). DuBose Associates designed the memorial, and TO Design, alongside granite benches, the memorial has pedestrian walkways which have bricks that have the victims’ names on them. The center of the memorial has a bronze medallion where the center of the ring was located (Unfinished Business, 2004).

In visiting the memorial, it has a very simplistic design, and it lies in a beautiful field behind the elementary school. It is impressive to see how big the tent was, which is marked by trees which mark where the tent stood. When you’re in the middle of the memorial, there are bricks which state all the victim’s names, and tablets which give a timeline of what happened during the fire. The location of the memorial is not in a great area; times seem to have changed since the circus fire. People were hanging out, smoking, and loud music nearby, and there was litter everywhere. The grounds where the memorial sits seem a bit unkempt. The grass was tall, full of weeds, and relatively not well maintained. It is a real shame that the city does not take care of such a memorial that means so much too many.

References:

• "10 human panic factors that made a circus fire deadly." Fire Rescue 1. Bruce Hensler, n.d. Web. 27 Apr. 2017.
• "The Hartford Circus Fire." The Hartford Circus Fire. Kevin Flood, n.d. Web. 27 Apr. 2017.
• "Unfinished Business." Tribune digital-courant. N.p., 16 Feb. 2004. Web. 27 Apr. 2017.