Does anyone know what kind of flowers these are? What happened here is that I store my seeds inside a box, it's usually nice and neat through the winter but when I start planting indoors its a mess, and some seeds fall at the bottom of the box. This beautiful number was on the bottom of the box.

More Signs of Spring

It's getting colorful.

Native Wildflowers for Your Garden

Call before you Come

Normal people have people call ahead of visiting so they can pick up a little, while we need that extra few minutes to hide anything of value and lock all the doors to all the rooms. I find that sad that when certain family members come over we actually have to do that. There are only two guests, in particular, we do that for, and it's sad every time. What angers me is that they don’t call most of the time, and we get caught by surprise and it’s a proven fact that something goes missing. Both visitors don’t come to visit me or James of course, they are grandma’s visitors. The list of things that always go missing is money, body sprays, lotions, photographs of other family members lying around, food, essential oils, my children's toys and so much more.

I don’t know what the message is with this post, but you can't trust anyone. Not even the “visitors” who come and visit for 2-3 minutes every couple of months. You ask what happens when they come and everything is locked up. They have no shame, and they will outright ask for it until you say yes. This can be $20, $200 or whatever cosmetic item they want.

If I open up my home to someone I don’t expect them to steal. They hardly visit their mom, and my grandmother is 100% the reason I allow these people to visit. It’s disrespectful to steal from that person who devoted their own life to take care of YOUR mother.

Sad, and embarrassing. Not for me though… I got EVERYTHING I need without stealing or begging for it. 

New growth in the Garden

I asked for Help

I may be getting help taking care of my grandmother.

I feel weak, and disappointed asking for outside help to take care of my grandmother. Throughout the years I’ve asked for help from family when it came to taking care of Grams and it was always as if they never listed, and even one of her children offered to take care of Grams only if I paid $30 a day, you know for drug money. Yeah…her own mother. I kindly refused that one offer.

So, today I asked for outside help and this is the first time I’ve asked for it since I became my grandmother's full-time caregiver.

I feel embarrassed that I even had to ask an outside company for help taking care of my grandmother, but honestly, it’s needed. I’m looking at eight hours a week, which will be spread out during the week. I hope that I am able to be a better mother to my children and a better wife to my husband with this deserved break if it happens. 

Signs of Spring

I’m living under a rock.

I can feel the digital divide and the separation from society slowly closing. It kind of feels like a door slowly closing as you just stand there watching it. I literally have no clue what the outside world is like, and if I need to go to the store, I’m overwhelmed how everything is now.

It’s been only two years since I’ve been a 24/7 caregiver to grams, and I feel as if I missed out on so much. My friends no longer write to me on Facebook and forget about calling or texting it’s as if they forgot my number way before that. 

Everyone is so involved in their own lives and I’m here like “I’m stuck.” I stopped reaching out to them after it felt like a burden when I called to say hi. It’s not like I ever mentioned how things were with my family. I honestly would only text or call to see how they were doing.

 It was as if I was pulling teeth so I woke up one day and said: “fuck it.” I haven’t reached out to anyone since.

At the end of the day, yes... I'm living under a rock, but I don't mess with no one, and better yet no one messes with me. It's better that way...considering. 

New Growth in the Garden

 I'm excited to see new growth, and there are more signs of Spring here in Conneceticut.

I think Spring is really here now.

So it's true, Spring is finally here. Spring is a few weeks late but here are some beautiful new blooms.

More Signs of Spring

 As the days go by, things keep on growing. I always get excited when I see another plant blooming.

I think I may start hardening off my seedlings because it's been a couple of days since our last frost. I mean it's April so something has to give with the weather.

 I have not planted anything unique yet, because I haven't come across any seeds yet. I hope to come across some unique seeds in the nursery as they get more seeds in stock.

Signs of Spring.

I hope Spring is finally starting to show wherever you are (if Spring is your thing). Outside everything is blooming, and inside I have some new seedlings growing.

It took a while for Spring to make herself known, but she made a fashionably late appearance.

I cannot wait to see how the garden looks after everything begins to bloom. I'm very excited.